Hope

I’ve lost track of time
All that matters now
Is the sound of Beirut
The smell of fresh bread
The dog licking my feet
That tiny guitar
He practices over again
The crack in the window
Reveals a masked man
Walking alone
As he should be
We’ve got enough food
To last us the week
Our little family
The ivy survived
Through the coldest months
And I’m certain
That we can too

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Calling

When I found my calling I knew because
Life started sounding different.
My morning caffeine hit became
A symphony of scent massaging my mind.
The orchestra grew louder each day
As I floated weightlessly
through my morning walk.
Each step more buoyant than the next –
That sunny, stable cadence.
The crescendo came
When birds’ wings fluttered
And the leaves cast vibrato shadows
On the dampened pavement.
I held his hand and only felt softness
Despite all the cracks.
Breakfast waited at home –
Fresh fruit that sang when it was peeled
I promise, you could hear it
If you listened closed enough.
All this time it’s been singing
While we searched for our purpose
Waiting for us to realize
We’ve been conductors all along.

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When the world stopped

When the world stopped,
it happened slowly
Like the stages of grief, it crept
Adam bought too many groceries
“we’ll never eat that much fucking ravioli”
I was mad at him for panicking
Because I was panicking too
Schools closed, then bars, then everything else
Chaos and disorder.
We’re animals after all

When the world stopped,
It happened slowly at first
Then it was quick
Now we stay in our cages
Only come out for food and exercise
When we do, we keep 6 ft. between us
Because my breath is fatal and so is yours
We aren’t murderers of course
Still we hoard supplies –
Leave no bread or milk for our neighbours

When the world stopped
It was every man for themselves
We kept our space
We stockpiled essentials
We hid in our bunkers.
But then we started to smile
Humbly locking eyes
Acknowledging our new normal
We’re just animals after all
Alone together, doing the best we can

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Rise

You used to be part
Of my every breath.
Each step was fuelled
By a memory of you.

The streets, once etched
In newness and novelty
Became a mere excuse
To see your face.

But you never came.
Even when I played our song
Turned our corner
Or wore my best.

How foolish I was to try
And will you into my life
When you were never meant
To be mine.

Now matter how hard
The earth begs for the sun
He will always appear
When he’s good and ready.

You’ve set somewhere else –
I understand. I just wish
You would rise on me
One more day.

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Unattainable

I can’t help but feel jealous
Of how their satin skirts
Cling desperately to every limb
Offset by rugged leather
And sultry studs.
The message is clear:
I’m stunning, yet edgy
Feminine and daring.
Their buzzed heads shine
So freely upon
Plump limps and
A smirk that says
I’m unattainable.

I want to attain it.

But then I remember
The way my skin tingles
When I read his words
‘A falcon, a storm, or a great song?’
The goosebumps
Cling to my limbs
Scaling every inch of
My wakening body
Making me feel more
Beautiful than any satin
Or leather ever could.
I look up at the clouds
Weaving gently into themselves
And smile as my heart
Dances then explodes.

My insides are soft, yet reckless.
Brilliant and fierce.

What I have can never be attained.

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